Discovering the right significant other often seems like looking for pinch of hay in a huge collection of needles: a agonizing procedure with somewhat limited benefits.
While online dating sites remove the need to get dolled up, douse yourself in nice smells, and get out there, that doesn't mean there aren't manners to adhere to.
Just like in real life, you'll need to come across as wonderful, courteous and suitable, and just like in real life, a little bit of good advice can make proceedings a whole lot simpler.
Here at My Vegetarian Dating, we want your online dating experience to be as successful and fun as possible. So stay tuned, and we'll explain to you ten Golden Rules every online dater should follow for the best results.
1. Go Get Em, Tiger!
There are a lot of prospective candidates out there awaiting you, but just like in the actual world, competition is tough. Enhance your possibilities by focussing on as many individuals as possible, and try not to get hung-up on that one lady who used to be a playboy magazine rabbit, or that one guy who looks like David Beckham- every other person on the website will have messaged them too.
Guys, try to keep your responses genuine, and avoid the old technique of cutting and pasting (adapt each message to make it unique), and don't just say "hi" to 1000 people. But by the same token (and this is applicable mainly to women) always reply to attention, even if you don't like him - it's only good manners.
DO SAY: 'I'm NOT a stalker'
DON'T SAY: 'How are you? Wondering if it changed since 10 minute ago when I last asked?'
2. Don't Be Afraid To Stand Out From The Crowd
An eye-catching headline and sharing some of your more unusual passions can go a long way. Invest a few moments sharing a reasonable amount of information that reveals you as amusing and exclusive, instead of becoming a member of the hordes who give as their only passions 'Watching TV, and movies, listening to music'. Surely you can't be that boring? Be specific. Maybe you like 'Days Of Our Lives', 'Dancing Queen', and 'Titanic' (lol, kidding). Be cautious though, being too out-there may come across as strange and restrict your share of dating buddies.
DO SAY: 'When I'm not skydiving in Australia or giving guided tours around The Louvre, I like to go trekking in the Himalayas - but when I'm there I always try to find time to work with the street children of Calcutta.'
DON'T SAY : 'At night I like watching a DVD with a bottle of wine. My other hobbies include watching paint dry.'
3. Post a Real, Genuine Picture Of Yourself
We all do it: take lots of pictures and then choose the ones that display us in our best light - and there's nothing wrong with it. However, if you're airbrushing your picture before publishing it, or even using an picture of someone else, you've definitely cross the a line. See also: Choosing pictures of yourself from 10 years ago, when you were 10 pounds lighter
DO SAY: 'I think I look just great in this one I took last week, with my cat.'
DON'T SAY: 'Here's a picture of me with George Clooney and Brad Pitt at that showbiz party. No, I can't explain why they're all black and white, and I'm not'
4. Keep It Real
Ok, so this may appear to contradict Rule 2, but you have to know when we are pulling your leg.
Do your messages reveal you as someone whose interests include doing safaris in the Congo, eating in Michelin starred restaurants, and having dated heirs to the throne of a small European country? By all means try to sell yourself in different ways, but keep in mind the aim of online relationship is to set up a actual face-to-face meeting - and if she doesn't like you in real life when you finally rock up and meet her, you'll be in for an uncomfortable, brief brush off.
The regular guidelines of relationships apply: go for those who are genuine and whom you experience you'll truly just click with.
DO SAY: 'I don't have a personal aircraft or a luxury boat, but if likeability was cash I'd be a Donald Trump.'
DON'T SAY: 'I only date supermodels with their own yacht.'
5. Be HONEST
This goes hand-in-hand with Rule no 4. By all means make the most of what you've got, big yourself up and accentuate the positives in your life experience - but don't straight out lie. Hopefully you'll be actually meet your online dating pal in the near future, so girls, telling them you're a Victoria's Secret Model whose with pals Kanye West and Beyonce and you may get caught out if you're not actually a Victoria's Secret Model with...
DO SAY: 'I've been informed by friends that I am attractive, but if I'm honest I'm looking for someone I can click with with psychologically as well as physically.'
DON'T SAY: 'I'm definitely not just looking for sex...what's your chest size again?'
6. DON'T PUT YOUR BAGGAGE ON DISPLAY
Ok, so we said be honest, but, by the same token, don't be stupid! A lot of online daters have baggage from their previous - this may be anything from children to an overly possessive ex. Don't put off prospective suitors by putting this baggage in complete view of everyone: give individuals a opportunity to get to know you before you let them in and share the more personal details of your life.
DO SAY: 'I'm a laid-back guy, who's looking for someone with the same outlook.'
DON'T SAY: 'Please ignore my ex who will keep surveillance outside your house, drown your pets and vandalise your car if you hang out with me. By the way I have several tattoos of my last five girlfriends on my back'.
7. Be FUNNY AND GET TO POINT
Avoid composing 'War And Peace' when messaging prospective dates. Keep your missives brief and lovely - this will motivate you to make the most of the things you do say, maximising the effectiveness of your message. Remember: You only have a limited amount of time to grab people's attention. This also has the additional advantage of providing you a certain mystique: as you should know, most of fascination is what is unspoken, so be effective and keep them clinging on.
DO SAY: 'I'm setting out Los Angeles first thing tomorrow, so I'll say goodnight. Wish you were here to tuck me in...'
DON'T SAY: '...and then I went to a store and said to the lady, do you have these in a size 10, and she said to me no, so I said why not, and she said to me she didn't know, so I said do you have these in a size 12....'
8. SAFETY FIRST
It should goes without saying, never arrange to meet anyone you don't truly believe or feel right about. If this implies taking it slow and getting to know each other through Tweets and mobile phone calls, than so be it. Your personal safety is of the highest importance, unless of course you want an show of CSI to be the subject of your sorry little tale.
DO SAY: 'I'm totally happy going at whatever pace you're comfortable with.'
DON'T SAY: 'Meet me at the abandoned fairground at midnight.'
9. Remember that the online dating world is only an extension of the real one - not a magic fairy tale land.
As long as you keep in mind that an online relationship probably won't actually hand you on a plate the man/woman of your goals, and that even if it did, you might not stay happily ever after, and even if you do, you'll always have to keep with the truth you met on the world wide web... then you'll have a good time.
DO SAY: 'Behind the these words on a screen is a man with real feelings waiting to love you.'
DON'T SAY: 'If you stay online with me forever, we'll live happily ever after.'
10. DON'T BE OBVIOUS OR SLEAZY
If we're honest, sex is right up there with regards to why people get involved with online dating, yet just like in real life, nothing gives decreases the chances of this actually happening than acknowledging this scenario, whether directly or indirectly: at best you'll appear anxious, at worst, a desperate sex-fanatic.
So be chilled. Try to discreetly, gradually guide the topic of conversations towards the more erotic end of the things, but never be obvious about it. Just because you'd be pleased if a hot stranger asked you for no strings attached fun, straight out, not everyone else would. People have a lot of defences to get past, for all the right reasons, so take things slowly.
DO SAY: 'I really like staying up with a bestseller and a glass of wine, with the lights down low, it's even better when there's a wonderful lady relaxing next to me...'
DON'T SAY: 'No sex-related act is too bad or depraved for me. I'll do basically anything'.
Ok, now you've got some great advice to get you started, register or login to My Vegetarian Dating, and find your dates today!
No comments:
Post a Comment